19 Apr 2014

Love beyond love.

You are like a distant dream, yet I try to hold you,
You are magnificent and free, yet I try to bind you.
You are the quiet one, the silent and the shy,
You are the stranger, making me question how and why.

I met you never, never you will know,
You are the innocent, pure and bright as snow.
I am the fire, simmering away like a ghost,
And you are the forest, I wish to burn you slowly.

You are an angel with avenging light,
I am dark and sinister, galloping away at night.
You are like the moon crushed on water,
Unbeknownst suturing away my tears and laughter.

While I wish to end what I felt forever,
You come like a breeze, like a rosy shower.
I dare to tell you the truth, of my love,
But you would deny it like a treasure trove.

Though one day, fate may turn the tide,
I wish you maybe my  bride.
And the things I could not confide,
Would no longer be needed to hide. 

13 Apr 2014

The Frangipani Tree

"...And they say, that if you are not on your guard, they creep up to you and lure you to take something from them. Once you take whatever they offer, they grab you by the neck, and feed on you, with the frangipani smell lingering around, at night.So next time Mehek, make sure you don't come late at night, from under the frangipani tree." 

Rachna finishes the story with a straight face and lets the effect sink in. 

"Oh please, they should directly finish the person off instead of dragging them along with them.What bullcrap! Why go through so much trouble? They are spirits, not gymnasts or theater artists! And I have never felt anything when I walk past that tree. It's ridiculous." Mehek scoffs. 

"Mehek, don't you see the movies, those who don't believe the existence of spirits are the first ones to be ambushed and get disappeared?" Ankita smiles cheekily, nudging Mehek  in the ribs, who glares in return, "And that is the reason I should be scared? Because you will find me in such a situation? Ha! That's highly unlikely! What am I? A ghost hunter?"

"But Mehek, you don't have to believe them, just respect their existence. These things, entities do exist. And I am sure we all have, at some point experienced their presence, so don't get so defensive." Anandita intervenes, being Rachna's sister, she knew how Rachna tended to sensationalize stories and Mehek was cold-steel logical, never a good combination.

"Ugh, come on! Please, give me a break! We are just talking right, we don't have to believe or not believe! You guys should really stop taking these things seriously!" Mehek reacted, getting pissed off for no apparent reason.
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"Okay, okay relax! It's just a story, you don't have to get so mad at us!" Rachna tries to cut through the tension. 

"You are right. I am sorry. I didn't mean to snap at you guys. It's just that I am a little stressed with work..and...so sorry!" Mehek gets up, hugs Rachna, Ankita and Anandita one by one as they all get ready to disband the party. 

Rachna follows Mehek as they descend the stairs.

Rachna: I didn't understand though, why you got so mad at me?
Mehek: It's just that you were getting too personal.
Rachna: Personal? How?
Mehek: You know nothing about Yakshis, do you?
Rachna: Hey I know! That's how I told you the story.
Mehek: But you forgot the basics - like how they look and how they really attack.
Rachna: Really? As if you know, huh?

Mehek stopped and turned to face Rachna. "You know why they choose frangipani trees?"
Rachna <shrugs>: I don't know, because they smell nice? The flowers I mean?
Mehek: Yeah and?
Rachna: I don't know. Yakshis are women, right? So, I don't know, why are you asking me?
Mehek: They choose it, because the frangipani flowers are cursed, like Yakshis, they die by the light, they breed insects within them, they are beautiful, but once you touch them, they shrivel and die. Yakshis were cursed too, to survive like half human, half dead. They always lurk around that tree.

A shudder runs through Rachna.

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Mehek bends down and picks a fallen frangipani flower and offers it to Rachna. Her dark black hair frees itself from the hairband and leaves a trail of smell of frangipani flowers around the both of them. Rachna freezes beside her in horror. Uncertain thoughts flit through her mind. How long had they known Mehek? She never hung out with them during day time, she never really cared how late she would come back, she would always be so defensive when it came to supernatural. I am over thinking this. Mehek can't possibly be! These things don't really exist, do they? Should have heard Anandita, must not have told this story. 

Mehek: Hey you all right?
Rachna: Yeah yeah, see you tomorrow then! 
Mehek: I am sorry if you felt bad or something. See you!
Rachna: Kay...

Rachna turns around to leave, as Mehek walks away too. But Rachna couldn't hear her walking away, she was too scared to stop. Reaching the doorstep of her house, Rachna hides behind the door and peeps out to see Mehek, standing under the frangipani tree, talking to a woman who descends, no slithers down, and hugs Mehek. She is a tall beautiful woman, with long lustrous hair, like Mehek and has her hair strewn with frangipani flowers. A snatch from her grandmother's tale flashes through her mind. Notice their feet carefully, they never touch the ground. 

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PS: Inspired by the story "Mixed Blood" by Ravi Shankar, which was part of the Indian Ghost Stories, edited by Ruskin Bond, published by Penguin Books.
PPS: You can read my review of the book here

4 Apr 2014

Solitary Escapist?

"How many times have you told me, you love her,
As many times as I've wanted to tell you the truth
How long have I stood here beside you
I live through you, you looked through me.

Ooh, Solitude,
Still with me is only you
Ooh, Solitude,
I can't stay away from you."

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They smiled and waved at me, while I happily typed away on my laptop. I heard them calling out to me and looked up. As I nod at them, indicating I was going to join them, she comes from behind and wraps me in her arms.

"You can't abandon me,
You belong to me.

Breathe in and take my life in you,
No longer myself only you.
There's no escaping me, my love,

I try to pull away, still looking at my friends, my smile wavering and another feeling taking over me. I turn around and look at her. She is dangerously beautiful. Red lustrous lips, high cheek bones, long dark hair and dark green eyes. So seductively enticing. I gulp, nervously. She inches closer to me and whispers in my ears. I know you love me more. More than them. They cheat you, they latch onto your light, they hurt you, how can you forget? You can't open yourself like this to them?! I have been so loyal to you, since the day you found me and you are choosing THEM over me? I shudder at her proximity and look into her eyes again. 

"How many times have I done this to myself
How long will it take before I see
When will this hole in my heart be mended
Who now is left alone but me

Ooh, Solitude,
Forever me and forever you.
Ooh, Solitude,
Only you, only true."

She was speaking the truth. Absolute truth. I had opened myself one too many times and there was nothing left in me, nothing. I could not trust anyone, because I had been left alone so many times. And now when she had befriended me, despite all of my drawbacks, she had been standing by me.

"Everyone leaves me stranded,
Forgotten, abandoned, left behind.
I can't stay here another night,
Your secret admirer.
Who could it be?

Ooh, Can't you see?
All along it was me,
How can you be so blind?
As to see right through me."

I looked at my friends who were just staring at me, waiting outside my house. They were trying to call out to me, but I couldn't hear them anymore. She kissed on my cheek and turned me around. I pull away from her and make a dash towards the glass door, planning to break through it. I use all my force and hit the walls, the glass walls hard and solid around. I hurt bad and find her right behind. She starts laughing as I drop down on my knees, crying. She holds me and hugs me tight. I give in, finally succumbing to the comfortable warmth and love.

"Darling, there's no sense in running
You know I will find you
Everything is perfect now
We can live forever.
You can't abandon me,
You belong to me.

Breathe in and take my life in you,
No longer myself only you.
There's no escaping me, my love.


PS: The verses are from "Solitude" and "Surrender" songs of the Evanescence band, performed by Amy Lee.
PPS: Loneliness is very different from seeking solitude, but the lines do blur, if one is not careful.
PPS: Live life as if it's a gift, happiness and laughter are.